


Glow In the Dark Confessions

by Kissa



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Drabble, Drunken Confessions, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M, Parabatai Feels, jalec - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:54:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26476018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissa/pseuds/Kissa
Summary: Alec gets drunk on a mission and tells Jace he loves him. Love-loves him.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood/Jace Wayland
Comments: 6
Kudos: 51





	Glow In the Dark Confessions

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Polarnacht](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polarnacht/gifts).



> Inspired by Dom's recent Insta post where he's with mates and they are all happy and smiling, wearing just shorts and glow in the dark paint.

He could still taste the sweetness and the flavour of the last cocktail he’d had.  
  
Alec was totally against drinking while on a mission, but this time it had been a requirement for the mission. Jace had used him as bait for the demon they were hunting.  
  
Out in the mundane world, at a party location where mundanes came to let go of worries and frolic in the dark, it was the perfect hunting ground for demons, and that’s why the two Shadowhunters had been sent there.  
  
***  
  
Alec would have felt self-conscious if this had been a private time activity, but blending in required him and Jace to change into small beach shorts and let the hostesses dab glow in the dark paint on them. Jace had of course made it into a performance, dipping his finger into neon green and drawing an arrow down his torso, pointing to his crotch. Next, he’d used a mix of blue and pink to smear his palms, pressing them to Alec’s pecs, whistling at the result and at Alec’s surprised yelp.  
  
That had meant war, and soon they were splashing at each other with the paint and grappling, trying to smear each other in the most ridiculous places on their skins. For some reason the hostesses didn’t mind their immature antics and watched in amusement (and most likely, arousal too - Alec knew what effect Jace had on mundanes).  
  
So he’d set his strictly no enjoyment whatsoever rule aside because he was with Jace and he felt safe with his parabatai by his side. The party itself took a toll on his senses, with the many people rubbing against him from all directions, with the loud trance music and the strobe lights. It made Alec’s adrenaline spike and his heart beat faster.   
  
The demon came to him, trying to isolate him from the crowd and take him to a dark, out of the way spot. It looked like a tall, muscular man, almost as tall as Alec himself, and in a different world Alec would have thought the man attractive, except this was a demon and all it deserved was Jace’s seraph blade through its torso.  
  
When the last of the demon’s ashes vanished, Jace put his blade away and looked at Alec, who was breathing hard, looking like he was on the verge of a panic attack. He knew it wasn’t the demon, but the place they were in. For Jace, mundane parties were okay places to hang out, but he knew Alec didn’t do loud and colourful.  
  
Alec was also more than a little inebriated and he smiled sheepishly at Jace before reaching for him and wrapping him in his arms.  
  
Not in the way they usually did when they hugged to reaffirm their parabatai bond, but as a lover would. Arms loosely around Jace’s waist, hands resting flat on the bare skin above the small shorts.  
  
Alec kissed him. It was gentle and barely there, but Jace felt everything in that shy brush of Alec’s peach-flavoured lips against his. He had no idea where Alec had the confidence from or where he had learned to kiss like that, but Jace was loving every second of it.

“I love you, Jace. I’ve loved you for so long.” Alec said, voice not slurring in the least.  
  
“I know, Alec, I love you too.” Jace said, not moving away and letting Alec and himself have this small stolen moment. “We’re parabatai, of course we love each other.” Those words were more for himself, to keep up the pretense that it was all there was. He knew how much the words cut Alec, but hopefully his drunkenness would let him ignore the disappointing reality.  
  
Even drunk, Alec was having none of it.  
  
“No, Jace, I love-love you. I want you to be mine, but I’m too chicken to do anything about it sober. Don’t wanna fuck up our lives.” He spilled out his truth, the alcohol having blasted through his walls of propriety.  
  
“I know, Alec, I know.” Jace said, giving in and allowing himself to kiss Alec longer, deepening the kiss and tasting his parabatai like he had been dying to since he was old enough to know what those desires meant. “I love you too, I’ll never love anyone the way I love you. But I don’t want anything to happen to you just because I can’t resist my desires. And it hurts, Alec, it hurts so much to be so close and not be able to hold you like I want to; kiss you like I want to.” Jace said, feeling hot tears run down his cheeks. Confessing his biggest, most hidden truth to Alec, just having the words spill from his lips hurt, but also brought a sort of serene relief.  
  
He will have said it, and in the morning Alec would have a headache and wake up with no memory of their exchange. No harm done, other than to him.   
  
Alec brought his hands up to cup Jace’s cheeks, thumbs gently wiping away the tears.  
  
“You could never hurt me, Jace. Not by loving me. I’d give up everything. Every. Thing. If it meant I could have you.” He said, resting his forehead against Jace’s and letting one hand cradle Jace’s neck while the other went back down to rest on warm, bare skin.  
  
“Let’s get out of there, the noise is giving me a migraine.” Jace said, taking Alec’s hand and regretfully looking at his parabatai’s almost naked form, covered in the paint designs Jace had placed on him.  
  
He would have stayed among the mundanes forever, going against everything he’d been taught, if he could have had Alec like this.  
  
***  
  
Jace sent Alec his written report of the mission and then went down to the training room, going a few rounds with Hodge before taking Izzy’s invitation for a hand to hand sparring session.  
  
Alec came to find him, standing on the edge of the sparring floor, watching Jace and Izzy fight for a bit until Izzy noticed him and ended the round.  
  
“Hey. I need to talk to you.” Alec told Jace once Izzy headed for the showers.  
  
“Sure. Got a mission for me?”  
  
“No, not this time.” Alec said, taking a deep breath and turning around, knowing Jace would follow.

He went to the bell tower, to the small hallway leading to Jace’s room, where they were least likely to be interrupted by someone passing by.  
  
“I remember what I said to you at the party.” Alec said, raising a hand to curb Jace’s protest. “I remember and I meant it. I meant it then and I mean it now. I don’t… I can’t live like this anymore. So either break my heart now and get it over with, or say you’ll be mine. You’re my parabatai. We’re soulmates. How am I expected not to love you with all that I am?”

“The Clave won’t see it that way… I don’t care what happens to me, Alec, but you, you have a future. Don’t throw it away.”  
  
“A future others designed for me.” Alec spat out in anger. “What about what I want?”  
  
Jace reached for him and pulled him into his room, closing the door and runing it locked.  
  
“If I give in now, I don’t know what’ll happen with us next. But it’ll hurt so much, Alec. I will never be able to call you mine out in the open.” 

Alec sat on the edge of Jace’s bed, looking up at his parabatai, who paced around anxiously.  
  
“I don’t care, Jace. I don’t want titles and all that formal crap. I want you.”  
  
Jace looked at his parabatai, who was watching him with pleading eyes. He felt overcome with love and gratitude for having Alec as his parabatai, acutely aware of how deeply he would fall once he let himself give in. 

He pounced on Alec, knocking the air out of him as he straddled him and poured all his repressed need and ten years’ worth of loving him in secret into kissing Alec like he’d never kissed anyone before.  
  
“I want you too, Angel help me I want you so badly.” Jace said breathlessly, “and I’ll never want anyone but you. You were made for me, Alec. And I’m only yours.”  
  
Alec made a small, overwhelmed sound at Jace’s words, which only served to arouse him out of his mind.  
  
“Mine,” he said, hands starting to roam under Jace’s shirt, smiling at the utterly floaty feeling that took over him.  
  
(the end)


End file.
